MONEY. MEN. PLEASURE. PLAY.

Hello Monday 🌟🔥😃💖 .. what the hell has the rest of the week going to surprise me with ?!
 
MONEY 💰
 
Thanks to my human/victim not being heard, healed and released she was fucking with my abundance.
 
I am in love and appreciation that I earned enough to “get by” last week (a few debts didn’t get paid due to how I had earned so little that week)… by today all my accounts were starting to look bleak.
 
MEN. 🚹
 
Specifically one man in my life … triggered my victim. Interesting how I had been doing the chasing for months … interesting that I felt like I couldn’t get any of my needs met either by myself and or OTHER men.
 
Interesting I felt afraid to let him go … afraid I wouldn’t attract another or better or whatever relationship …
 
PLEASURE 💋 & PLAY 🌟
 
This is more than about sex. Sex is part of this equation however not the whole picture.
 
As much as I thought I was enjoying both of these in my life .. I wasn’t … especially how my last orgasm was .. well … on Tuesday. (Personally I love orgasms and having only one per week is a symptom – I prefer to have at minimum 3 per week. Considering all the different types, variety and intensities – it’s actually great for me to keep me connected/grounded/in flow.)
 
💥🔥💥
 
AS SOON AS I let my (inner) victim to be heard & witnessed .. allowed her to speak both words and energetically … she disappeared !
 
She got what she wanted … and I said to her:
 
Yes and now it is time for you to go. 👋🏼
 
(I used my own mix of doing an aspecting process, journalling exercise and turning triggers to treasure process.)
 
Im Sorry. Please Forgive Me. I Love You. Thank You.
 
💰💰💰 MONEY
 
After releasing my victim I let my inner masculine take charge … he sent off two invoices for dog walking that were due … he checked emails to find out there was a tantra client booking request for yesterday I missed 😳 (as I was too busy denying my victim to be released) …
 
And my inner feminine was busy sending out requests to the universe and listening to the intuitive guidance …
 
Thanks to her magick …
 
🚹 MEN !!
 
She helped me attract a tantra client for today!
 
I also feel finally ready to do something I had stopped myself from diving into because of fear — TINDER
 
Yes I am a TINDER virgin.
 
Also an old playmate has become a possibility 😜💋 as I realise now thanks to Ej Lorna Kristie and a few other women … I *can* attract the men I desire and require.
 
(and yes I will also be available for the other gender identities as I’ve recently become pansexual due to my Tantra work)
 
I also realised I am strong enough a woman to have my boundaries respected by myself. 👌🏼💕
 
( note: this is NOT an invite for you to be sleazy and send me inappropriate messages via FB. )
 
💋💥🌟 PLEASURE & PLAY
 
Thanks to some guidance from Rebecca (yet ultimately myself) … I unlocked yet another full body orgasm ..
 
This one was different tho to the one on Tuesday.
 
This one came without resistance as I was in surrender.
 
It really did feel like it started with my pussy then the energy/orgasm went all thru me.
 
I also let my pussy have a sunbathe after in thanks 💋💥🙏🏼
 
Plus I was (and still am at the time of this post) a little blissed out .. when I ate something .. I actually took pleasure in it .. experienced the food I was eating in a totally present mindful (different) way.
 
What was interesting when I was self pleasuring (more tantric type of masturbation – I used mostly breath, a little movement, touch (not necessarily on/near my pussy) and sound) … I remembered something Eyal said to me at his last workshop … and opened my eyes to “connect” with “universe” as my partner .. and I saw … a bee buzzing around (abundance totem) … a small yellow butterfly (another abundance totem) … my kitty cat who was interestingly drawn to me from wherever she was …
 
And curiously I felt “held” 🙌🏼 during it 💕
 
If you got all the way to the end – thank you 🙏🏼💕 I needed to “blog” it ❤️
 
Now time to “get my priestess on” (tantra client on his way!) 🌟💖
 
PS If you did read this all the way to the end – type the word GAZ 🐶😂

Were there times in the past year YOU found anything sexual (esp. penetrative sex) unpleasurable ?

Believe it or not, I have. Yes, even someone like me who has awoken her physical/sexual + emotional/mental + spiritual/energetic bodies … have had them in divine communion … have had at least two incidents in the past year !

These two incidents were with two different men .. one of them I had been on a date with (yeh, only one date) .. and it was a divine double lesson in both knowing where my boundaries were as well as realising I no longer could just “sleep around” like I used to do :/ (yes, I had been going thru what I called a slut phase (which I use in an empowered word) for the last 10 years since my late 20s) …. and the other was part of a three-some (I was the other woman – the “Unicorn” as I’m known in swinger circles) …. I felt fine being with the other woman (interestingly) however as the both the man/woman couple in this circumstance were also dom/sub (man as master) … I wasn’t in the right head-space to be dominated as I was wanting sensuality and other ‘needs’ there weren’t met at the time.

Thus I’d say this percentage is higher if more women readily admitted it.

It’s thanks to these two incidents that I now have very strong (and stable) boundaries around penetrative sex … and am very picky with how I will allow someone (even myself!) penetrate me with penis, vibrators, fingers, tongues or anything 😍😋

I also am more intune with my physical/sexual body for what it needs at any point in time – whether it is energetic, sensual or sexual (‘fuck me now’), domination/submission/kink. Sometimes it’s a mixture of two 😉 as it was for me last weekend when I was with the man in my life (I don’t label the relationship in purpose) .. he intuitively knew exactly what I wanted without me saying 🙂

He had me over his lap (playing into my kinky-nature).. whilst also touching me sensually (which I had been craving all week) … and giving my ass a slap every so often .. whilst also asserting himself enough so that I stayed in surrender (as I did slip out of ‘allowance’ and surrender every so often) … and surrender I did .. and the whole experience was multi-orgasmic. He hardly penetrated me with his fingers .. and NEVER TOUCHED MY CLIT 💓💓

It’s amazing my own personal journey in regards to my clit: I’ve come from ‘only’ being able to get off being clitorial (and not really ‘knowing’ any other orgasms) to being able to get off in multiple ways beyond it .. even in other parts of my body outside of my genitals (back, neck, legs, inner thigh, feet, breasts, etc).

I’m okay with sharing this (even tho’ some people might regard this post as soft porn or erotica) as I want the reminder myself of what is possible .. without actual penis in vagina sex.

That whole experience was so … just … insanely orgasmic on all levels.

This is why I’m incredibly excited about attending Awakening Female Pleasure beyond yoni massage – Brisbane later this month 😁 …. you’ll have to join The Bewitchful Connection ( Body | Love | Sexuality ) for the inside pics, video and insights that I share in regards to the event.